After more than one pint
I miss the last train again.
We put on your father’s records.
Stolichnaya and A Clockwork Orange.
We know that we are friends.
And all I want is the smell of you,
the heat of your body against mine.
When we kiss I ask of you
would you just sleep beside me?
You say yes, and I am so tired
as I give you everything I have
to give, on the first day of winter
with the rain and the fireworks
exploding outside, I blind you.
In the morning: half drunk and mad
with love. You, who can never be mine.
Julie Egdell is a poet from Newcastle upon Tyne. Her debut collection Alice in Winterland about her time living in Russia is published by Smokestack.